Little Song for Kimberly by Alison Pelegrin

Little Song for Kimberly

by Alison Pelegrin

Child, don’t bother tracking down your kin.

Keep Out. Police line—can’t come in. Though I guess

You’ll wonder why you’re mean like a Marine,

Where you got them smarts. Blame it on us—

Olympic liars, a.k.a. your mama’s side.

We never knew there was a you, I swear.

And once we did, Amanda said you died,

Sent us hunting for your cremains everywhere.

The ones who have you now can’t be so bad.

I bet you never toddle in the dirt

With a filthy face and hands. When you get mad,

Don’t wish for us. What hurts won’t always hurt.

You mother knew she couldn’t do no better.

She’s dead. She died young. You look just like her.

This poem was originally published in the autumn 2009 issue of The Country Dog Review. The poet, Alison Pelegrin, was the Poet Laureate of Louisiana from 2023-2025. You can buy her latest book, Our Lady of Bewilderment, from Louisiana State University Press.

This poem is a persona poem and an American sonnet. Although it has no end rhyme, it is full of internal rhymes and slant rhyme. Each line has a similar meter/syllable count. And the voice of the speaker? Strong and vivid--she tells us a story without being narrative. I picture a maternal grandmother or maternal aunt for no good reason (i.e., no reason in the poem).

Kimberly is a young teen in foster care who has contacted her someone in her birth family. Because the speaker's voice to so conversational, I imagine an in-person meeting, although a phone call would work as well.

This line speaks volumes:

We never knew there was a you, I swear.

It not only provides us with some history, but it gives us a clue to the hurt and anger present in a question from the girl that was asked before the poem started, something to the effect of, "Why didn't any of you take me/call me/find me/adopt me?" Of course, given the line before this one (Olympic liars, a.k.a. your mama’s side) if Kimberly is speaking to a member of her mother's family, this might not be true. In that case, the "I swear" takes on a much more devious subtext.

We find out the girl's mother is Amanda, and she lied to her family by telling everyone her daughter had died.

In line 9, we get a semi-volta, in that the direction of the conversation changes. The speaker turns to the foster family:

The ones who have you now can’t be so bad.

She then backs this up with what she imagines for the girl and her foster family, although it is a fairly low bar, in lines 10-11. Another volta/change comes in line 11, when the speaker gets more serious.

She tells Kimberly, in essence, to be grateful for her foster family, to be thankful she was given the opportunity to grow up away from this family. She adds some advice we can all use:

What hurts won’t always hurt.

The last two lines emphasize everything the speaker had previously told the girl. Her mother, Amanda, gave her up knowing she would be better off, acknowledging she would not be a great mom and her family was also not up to raising a child.

The last line is, of course, the clincher. Amanda is dead. The speaker tells us she died young, which we already surmised. That the speaker does not say how she died, as well as the fact that we know she was not in a stable family situation herself, seems to point to a tragedy, be it drugs, violence, or alcohol. The girl's visit has been somewhat in vain.

And then those last 5 words! "You look just like her." Her, the tragically dead young mother.

Is it meant to be soothing? It seems somewhat cruel, as if the speaker is implying looking like her mother means Kimberly will turn out like her mother. Or maybe it was not meant as anything more than an observation, something that just popped out of the speaker's mouth as soon as it hit her brain. The ambiguity here is a powerful way to end this poem.

I should admit to assuming Kimberly is in foster care; she could also be adopted. There is nothing in the poem to steer us one way or the other.

I love the ambiguity throughout this poem. How young was Amanada when she died? When she had Kimberly? Is the police line a metaphor or has the girl shown up to a crime scene? These and the other things I have already mentioned do not diminish the poem for me in any way. I just plugged in what I visualized in my mind while I was reading, based on the information the poem does provide.

I think we all know/know of a family like the one presented here, so we can imagine possible scenarios for any piece of this story that is not detailed. I think this would be a much lesser poem if we were given every specific; for one thing, the form would be gone--forms are great in forcing poets to be very tight with their words and information. Also, the incredible voice here would be lost--the poem would become a list of facts, which would be dull and unrealistic. Now, we feel as if we are standing on the porch (that is the setting I imagine) right there, listening to this woman talk to Kimberly.

In poems, the thin and invisible lines separating the right amount of specific details and too much and too little moves with every poem. Few poets get this right immediately, and it is often the part of a poem most in need of revision. (I may be projecting here!) I think this poem nails it!

I am not going to promise no war poems going forward, but I am going to refrain from posting nothing but. See you on Wednesday!